Baby Colic: Signs, Soothing Techniques & Surviving the Witching Hour

There is nothing quite like the helplessness of holding a screaming baby in the middle of the night, trying everything, and nothing working. That was our life for about six weeks — our baby would cry for hours every evening, inconsolable, fists clenched, face red. We thought we were doing something wrong, that something was seriously wrong with our baby. What we eventually learned was that our baby had colic — a common, frustrating, but ultimately temporary condition. In this guide, I share what colic really is, the soothing techniques that helped us, and how to take care of yourself when it feels like the crying will never end.

What is colic and how do I know if my baby has it?

Colic is defined as episodes of intense crying in an otherwise healthy baby, lasting more than 3 hours a day, more than 3 days a week, for more than 3 weeks. The classic "rule of threes" was coined by pediatrician Morris Wessel in 1954 and is still used today. Colic typically begins around 2-3 weeks of age, peaks at 6-8 weeks, and gradually improves by 3-4 months. The crying usually happens in the late afternoon or evening (often called the "witching hour") and comes on suddenly. During a colic episode, your baby may: clench their fists, draw their legs up toward their belly, have a red or flushed face, pass gas, have a tense or bloated belly, and be difficult to soothe. The key distinction is that colicky babies are healthy — they eat well, gain weight normally, and are content between episodes. If your baby is not gaining weight, has feeding difficulties, vomiting, fever, or seems unwell between crying episodes, it may not be colic and you should see your pediatrician. Our baby fit the classic pattern perfectly — happy in the morning, screaming from 5 PM to 9 PM every night. It was exhausting, but knowing it was colic and not something we were doing wrong was a relief.

What causes colic?

Despite decades of research, the exact cause of colic remains unknown. There are several theories, and it is likely that colic has multiple causes rather than one. The most common theories include: gastrointestinal discomfort — gas, reflux, food sensitivities (especially cow's milk protein), or an immature digestive system may cause discomfort; nervous system immaturity — a baby's developing nervous system may have difficulty self-soothing and regulating responses to stimulation; temperament and sensitivity — some babies are simply more sensitive to their environment and have a lower threshold for overstimulation; and parenting factors — while early theories blamed "nervous mothers" or inadequate parenting, these have been thoroughly debunked. Colic is not caused by anything you are doing wrong. In our case, our pediatrician suspected a combination of gas and sensitivity to something in my breastmilk (I was drinking a lot of cow's milk). When I cut out dairy, the crying improved within a week — though this does not work for every baby. It is important to note that colic is not a sign of a serious medical problem in the vast majority of cases, but it is always worth discussing with your pediatrician to rule out other causes.

What soothing techniques actually help with colic?

Every baby is different, and what works one night may not work the next. These are the techniques that helped us, recommended by pediatricians and colic survivors. First, the "5 S's" method by Dr. Harvey Karp: Swaddling (a tight, cozy swaddle recreates the womb), Side or stomach position (holding baby on their side or tummy while awake — always place on back to sleep), Shushing (loud white noise or shushing in their ear — louder than you think), Swinging (gentle rhythmic motion — rocking, bouncing, walking), and Sucking (pacifier, breast, or bottle). We found that combining all five — swaddled, held on our side, shushing, bouncing on an exercise ball, with a pacifier — was the most effective. Second, try different holds. The colic hold (also called the airplane hold) — baby lying on their stomach along your forearm, head in the crook of your elbow, legs straddling your hand — applies gentle pressure to the belly and can be very comforting. The football hold, upright shoulder hold, and lying across your knees are also worth trying. Third, gentle tummy massage. Using warm hands, massage your baby's belly in clockwise circles, and gently bicycle their legs. This can help release trapped gas. A warm bath before the fussy period can also help relax the abdominal muscles. Fourth, white noise. A white noise machine, fan, or even the sound of a vacuum cleaner or hair dryer can be remarkably effective. The sound should be loud — about as loud as a shower — and placed near the crib (but not too close to the baby's ears). Fifth, movement. Walking, rocking, bouncing on an exercise ball, going for a car ride, or using a baby swing can provide the rhythmic motion that calms a colicky baby. We spent many evenings bouncing on an exercise ball. Sixth, check for feeding issues. If breastfeeding, try eliminating common allergens from your diet (dairy, soy, eggs, nuts) for 2-3 weeks to see if it helps. If formula feeding, talk to your pediatrician about switching to a hypoallergenic or sensitive formula. Burp your baby frequently during feeds, and try different feeding positions to reduce swallowed air. Seventh, gripe water or gas drops. Simethicone gas drops are generally considered safe and may help with gas. Gripe water (a herbal supplement) is popular but its effectiveness is not well-proven, and some formulations contain alcohol or sugar — check with your pediatrician before using. Finally, know when to hand off. If you are at your breaking point, hand the baby to your partner, a family member, or a friend and take a break. A frazzled, exhausted parent cannot soothe a colicky baby effectively.

How do I take care of myself during colic?

This is the most important and most overlooked part of dealing with colic. Colic is incredibly stressful for parents. The constant crying, the sleep deprivation, the feeling of helplessness — it can lead to anxiety, depression, and even feelings of resentment toward your baby. It is crucial to take care of yourself. First, accept that it is temporary. Colic almost always improves by 3-4 months. Write that date on the calendar and count down. It will end. Second, ask for and accept help. Let friends and family bring meals, do laundry, or hold the baby while you shower or nap. You do not have to do this alone. Third, take breaks. When the crying becomes too much, place your baby in a safe place (crib, playpen) and step into another room for 5 minutes. Take deep breaths, drink water, splash cold water on your face. Never shake a baby — if you feel like you might lose control, put the baby down and walk away, or call someone for help. Fourth, connect with other parents. Join a colic support group (online or in person), talk to friends who have been through it, and remind yourself that you are not alone and you are not a bad parent. Fifth, take care of your physical health. Eat regular meals, stay hydrated, sleep when the baby sleeps (even if it is just 20 minutes), and get outside for fresh air when possible. A walk with the baby in a stroller can be calming for both of you. Sixth, consider professional support. If you are feeling overwhelmed, depressed, or anxious, talk to your doctor or a mental health professional. Postpartum depression and anxiety are common and treatable. There is no shame in asking for help. Remember: a calm, rested parent is the best soothing tool your baby has.

FAQ

Q: How long does colic last?
A: Colic typically begins around 2-3 weeks, peaks at 6-8 weeks, and gradually improves by 3-4 months. Most babies outgrow colic completely by 4-5 months. While it feels endless when you are in the middle of it, it is temporary and will pass.

Q: Is colic a sign that something is wrong with my baby?
A: In the vast majority of cases, no. Colicky babies are otherwise healthy — they eat well, gain weight normally, and are content between episodes. However, it is always worth discussing with your pediatrician to rule out other causes like reflux, food allergies, ear infections, or other medical conditions.

Q: Does cutting out dairy from my diet help with colic?
A: For some breastfed babies, cow's milk protein in the mother's diet can contribute to colic symptoms. Eliminating dairy for 2-3 weeks may help, but it does not work for every baby. If you try it, make sure you are getting enough calcium from other sources. Always consult your pediatrician or a lactation consultant before making major diet changes.

Q: Is it okay to let my colicky baby cry it out?
A: For newborns with colic, it is generally not recommended to let them cry it out — they are too young to self-soothe and the crying is due to discomfort, not manipulation. However, if you are overwhelmed and need a break, it is safe to place your baby in a crib and step away for a few minutes to calm down. This is not "crying it out" — it is self-preservation. Come back when you are calmer.

Summary

Colic is a common, frustrating, but temporary condition affecting up to 20% of babies. It is defined by the rule of threes — crying more than 3 hours a day, 3 days a week, for more than 3 weeks — and typically peaks at 6-8 weeks before improving by 3-4 months. The exact cause is unknown, but theories include gastrointestinal discomfort, nervous system immaturity, and temperament. Soothing techniques include the 5 S's (swaddle, side position, shushing, swinging, sucking), different holds (especially the colic hold), tummy massage, white noise, movement, checking feeding issues, and gas drops. The most important thing is to take care of yourself — accept help, take breaks, connect with other parents, and remember that it is temporary. You are not doing anything wrong, and this will pass. You and your baby will get through this together.